Remember when weekends were fun?? When I was a kid I was always soooo excited for the weekend to arrive. Weekends meant rollerskating, swimming, playing house, climbing trees, riding bikes, and playing Marco Polo, skip-it, and Chinese jump-rope for more than just the few hours of daytime left after school – we had two entire days, from morning till night, for play-time. It was bliss.

And even though we all say we’re looking forward to the weekend as adults, weekends are now fun because we can get things done, not because it’s time to leave every ounce of responsibility behind and throw caution to the wind. Saturday and Sunday to-dos used to be “tag Julie,” “feed breakfast to my family of Cabbage Patch Kids, My Child dolls, and the Pound Puppies,” and “watch The Princess Bride.” But today, my list reads more like “Do groceries,” “organize bedroom closet” and “get oil change.” Hardly as much fun.

I caught a glimpse of “real-life weekends” when I was a teenager and started driving (and dating a Montreal boy long-distance) – my two primary “expenses” were my car insurance and gas, as well as my long-distance phone bills to Canada. I was lucky enough to have parents who owned an office cleaning company – they gave me four small offices to clean every weekend, and I made enough money to cover my weekly expenses. It would take me maybe three hours. The offices were closed on weekends, which meant I could go and clean them at any time from Friday evening till Sunday night. If I was smart I would actually take care of them after school on a Friday – then I didn’t have anything hanging over my head during the weekend. But when I had a busy teenager-weekend, and it was suddenly four o’clock Sunday afternoon and there was still work to do, it was awful. “It’s not fair, though,” I would whine to my unsympathetic parents (and rightfully so!). “It’s the weekend.” I had three measly hours of work to do – most of my friends had part-time jobs and did more like 20 hours of work a week after school as well as on weekends. True, they got to serve ice cream and bagels while I was scrubbing toilets in doctor’s offices (so gross), but I was also making double what they did and had to work three lousy hours.

While it’s true that I still enjoy the occasional plan-free relaxing weekend, when you’re a grown-up, you just can’t enjoy doing nothing without feeling guilty for the wasted time (at least I do). I may have spent yesterday catching up on cult-classic 80s flicks I’d never seen, but by 7pm I had to get up and wash the dishes as well as clean the bathroom – I felt so bad for having “wasted” a day on myself that I had to get something done.

I want a carefree weekend. I want a weekend where I don’t have anything to do but play hopscotch in my driveway, eat a Lunchable or boiled hot dog (without the worry about all the nitrates I’m ingesting), go fishing on the bridge with the neighbourhood kids, play “restaurant” at my friend’s house (and this time we won’t leave Tupperware in the oven so it melts when their mom preheats the oven!), play a few games of Mike Tyson’s Punch Out and ExciteBike, make some Shrinky-Dinks, feed my Sea Monkeys, watch TGIF (with Full House and Urkel), go sledding on my Smurf saucer, and snack on Fruit Roll-Ups and Gushers. I want staying up late to feel like a real treat. And I want to do it all without a care in the world. I miss those childhood weekends where nothing was planned and every Saturday and Sunday felt like the best Saturday and Sunday ever!

Where did the weekends really go?

1- Damn that drippy to-go coffee cup! Where is the mysterious drip coming from? It tortures me with one droplet of boiling coffee on my hand every few seconds… drip… drip… drip.

2- It’s a common complaint, I know, but all you text-addicts – stop walking and texting. It can be very dangerous – don’t let THIS happen to you.

3- When you’re meandering around the mall or down a crowded sidewalk, the flow of people-traffic moves like actual traffic- stay on the right when going in one direction and on the left for the other. Who’s the nimrod walking against traffic and causing all the backlog?

4- My dentist has cool pics on his ceiling. I had that idea years ago. I think the new thing they should invent is ceiling aquariums.

5- Buy your spices at bulk stores. When you purchase the pretty little bottled spices at the grocery store you’re paying for the packaging. I needed to restock on cinnamon, dried mustard, and nutmeg – I hit up Bulk Barn and bought WAY more than just a bottle’s worth of each – and the total was $3.19.

It’s Thursday, I know, and it’s not a designated blog day, but I had to get this out…

Yesterday this was my status on Facebook: “Jenn C. likes to use FB to air grievances every so often, but airing out dirty laundry and belly-aching and moaning and groaning about how awful your life is is not going to change anything. If you need a friend you can always message me privately, but don’t share your innermost dark demons with all of us. It’s kinda eye-roll inducing…”

I share A LOT of my personal life on Facebook. I work from home allllll day long, and sharing my thoughts or plans on Facebook and Twitter is a way for me to feel “connected” to others throughout my day (heck, for a social butterfly like me it’s difficult not having co-workers). But I also realize that I am “branding” myself out there in cyberspace by what I type. Sure, I’ll share the odd day that I’m feeling bummed because, more likely than not, one of my friends or followers will post something that will brighten my day. And yes, when I had my wisdom teeth pulled or had to deal with some icky grown-up matter, I’m not afraid to complain about it a bit. However, all in all, I think that most people would describe me as a happy person because I like to keep it “light” on the internet.

Some people just don’t get it… they use Facebook to share really personal info about their marriages or relationships, children, jobs, or their general outlook on life. Their statuses and comments revolve around the “glass is half-empty” way of thinking. Look – I get that sometimes we feel lonely and social networks can be a strangely comforting way of seeking out some solace and friendship. But when you’re posting things several times a week, even a number of times throughout the day, you may not realize the impact you’re having on other people. Think about it: for those who aren’t in your immediate local social circle, your Facebook status and comments are the ONLY things that people will know about you. And if they’re regularly in the negative-vein of things, then people probably don’t have the greatest impression of who you really are. Yes, it’s only Facebook, but all those people you went to high school with and haven’t seen in (ahem) 12 years are saying, “Wow, he/she was so different back in high school. What a Debbie downer!”

Maybe you don’t care what people think… good for you! Then you won’t be insulted when people start de-friending you. Like I said in my status yesterday – I can be a friend to anybody. If you’re lonely or sad or dealing with inner demons, I will honestly and truly be there for you because I sincerely care about everyone. I really do. But the public displays of wallowing are making Facebook more like a therapist’s office than a cool place for us to hang out.

Think about it…

I posted a question on my Facebook group yesterday and asked people whether they give money to homeless people. The consensus was split – half said they would not while the other half said they would (as @LazyBride put it, “Can’t receive with a closed fist”). A lot of people (including myself… kinda) believe that the homeless people in Canada have more than enough resources in our awesome country to find work and get back on their feet (so hence a lot of people opted to donate to missions and organizations as opposed to individual people). My argument to that was, our services are still lacking in that there are a lot of people living on the streets who suffer from mental illness and therefore don’t have the “means” to seek out these resources – this is where our government falls short.

I personally try to give homeless people food, hot drinks, or cigarettes before I hand them money. I think a lot of us don’t give money because we figure it will be used for drugs or alcohol. But one Facebook poster (Bonnie) pointed out something: “For me whether they spend it on food or drugs is not my issue, I would hope that they would buy a warm meal and feed their belly but if you’re dealing with an alcoholic in withdrawal on a cold night, this may help keep them alive (or not)… a person’s check-out date is not up to me.” A lot of people who live on the streets left home because they were dealing with worse circumstances there. Maybe having a drink is their one escape. So Bonnie is right – who am I to say what they should spend their money on? If I was living on the streets I don’t know that I’d quit smoking cigarettes because that may be my one “luxury.”

I’ve mentioned my love of the show “World of Jenks” and there was an episode where he lived with a homeless girl. She had left home because her parents were alcoholics and very violent. She had lost her social security card and was trying to get it back so she could get a job. But until then, she was forced to live on the street and panhandle. The way that people would just walk by and ignore her was shameful (the song “Another Day in Paradise” by Phil Collins comes to mind). Passers-by didn’t know her story but they had already labeled her as just another lazy street kid who wasn’t deserving of help.

You know we all do it – we walk down the street and see a person who is asking for spare change up ahead, and we immediately divert our eyes. Don’t make eye contact or they’ll hound you for money. Pretend like you don’t see them. Well, no one deserves to be ignored, no matter what their “story” is. If they’ve chosen a life on the streets then they need some kind of help in the first place. And by turning a blind eye, you’re only contributing to the overall problem.

Spend five minutes with a five-year-old and you’ll be instantly amused by their brutal honesty. You realize that they’re like little sponges, so every move you make, every word you say, they are watching you (thanks Sting).

I have a bright, beautiful, creative, polite, super cool five-year-old niece Serenity and she makes me happy and warms my heart the minute she enters a room. Here are some simple life lessons this tiny person has taught me:

- Think outside the box. I might have been a creative child in that I was good at colouring, but Serenity colours people’s skin orange, she gives them pink hair and yellow or purple eyes. She is so much better at make-believe than I ever was. Her imagination is so open and free, and it shines through in the stories she tells me, the activities we do, and the games she makes up. I constantly find myself stopping to think “it’s true – Cinderella’s face doesn’t have to be ‘beige.’”

- It’s the simple things that are the best things. A slinky, a black pen and white sheet of paper, hide n go seek – having fun and making memories isn’t all about grand plans and expensive toys – just sitting together quietly playing teacher/student by drawing matching pictures in notepads can be the best way to spend an afternoon.

- Slow down. When a child walks with half the stride as you, you find yourself walking at a much slower pace. Cooking a meal isn’t a beat-the-clock marathon when you have a little helper who wants to do the stirring and pouring and mixing. Baths are about both function and fun – get clean but also play a quick game of squirt-wars with plastic frogs and ducks. It makes you realize how quickly we insist on doing things in our day-to-day life… and for what? Why are we spending our grown-up years racing around?

- You have an impact on people. Little people and adults. You are being heard. What you say does have an impact on someone. Don’t ever think that your voice or your actions are going unnoticed. Serenity taught me this when she said “Are you going to bed straight?” (she must have heard the expression “straight to bed” and mixed it up!), or when she was about to go to sleep when she was three and she piped up, “Auntie Jenn and Uncle Mike, I won’t do no monkey business” (I guess mommy and daddy warned her not to do any monkey business!). Be accountable. Think before you speak and act. It took a toddler to really ingrain this in my head.

We’re having our niece Serenity over for the weekend (last time she made it till about 10pm and then decided she wanted Mommy so we drove her home… she told me at Christmas that she wanted to come back and, this time, she won’t go home). I’ve been excited all week to have her – who doesn’t love a great excuse to eat animal-shaped sandwiches, colour in colouring books, and watch Disney movies in a fort?

So in honour of little ones, here are some RANDOM THOUGHTS… from when I was a kid.

1- I swore when I grew up I was going to have cake for breakfast and ice cream sundaes for dinner. And I have, only it wasn’t as much fun as I had imagined. It was more on the sad, pathetic side of things.

2-I used to think that pears tasted like they had sand in them and yogurt had an “expired” flavour, and today I love these foods.

3- Before the writing bug bit me as a young teen, I wanted to be a marine biologist when I grew up and marry a lifeguard like Matt Brody on Baywatch.

4- I always thought that when my parents kissed or hugged or held hands it was gross. Now, nothing makes me happier than seeing them still in love.

5- I used to love getting mail when I was little. If I got mail it was my Highlights magazine, a letter or postcard from one of several pen pals, or a card for my birthday or Christmas. Now I hate opening my mailbox. It’s bills or grown-up letters or confusing applications for credit cards or new bank services or high-yield savings accounts. Leave me alone!

I’m a flag-toting, eh-dropping, moose-lovin’ fool, and I’m damn proud of it!

Growing up in the States, I was a very patriotic Canadian. It’s what made me “unique” in school, and I wore a Canadian flag on my backpack with pride as well as on my car. I talked about how great Canada (and Montreal) was to the point that I remember my American friends having an “intervention” to tell me how sick they were of hearing about my motherland. During the time that I lived in Florida I always wanted to live in Canada… I missed my “home.” Even with all the years I spent in the U.S., and even though the Sunshine State was an incredibly amazing place to grow up, I felt this immensely strong undeniable connection to Canada.

And ever since moving back, I’ve been really content to be back in the country where I was born and raised. It sounds corny, but I am a damn proud Canadian. I get excited when I hear the Hockey Night In Canada theme, I walk around holding my brown Tim Hortons’ cup with pride, and even with characters like Don Cherry, Mr. Dressup, Bryan Adams, Pam Anderson, and Jim Carrey acting as some of our more well-known Canadian figures, they represent the confident hockey-loving, corny, rockstar, sexy, oddball who can laugh at themself, and this makes us who we are. We eat Beavertails and curds and dill pickle chips and maple syrup on ice, we drink milk out of bags, we pay more for books, we build rinks in our backyards in wintertime and move to the streets in summer, beer is one of our food groups, we’re protected by police on horses and feel safe and are safe, we wear tuques with pompoms (even the guys) and are still considered cool, and it’s our acceptance of different cultures and languages, which come together in the name of Canadian patriotism that makes us great.

I AM CANADIAN and there’s nothing I’d rather be!

I’m hooked on Netflix. I absolutely love documentaries and there’s an entire category of options with all types of flicks – self-made, professionally-made, social experiments, ridiculous topics, and more. So here are the top ones I’ve seen – you should try and check them out.

1- No Impact Man – Colin Beavan is this super cool guy who’s married to an equally cool wife and together they have an absolutely adorable daughter. Colin blogs (check it out here) and shares his experience on film (not to mention has written a book and started a non-profit) about trying to live life in New York City without leaving an impact on the environment – no waste, garbage or emissions. While I don’t think that people who watch this film are going to shut off their electricity and start composting with worms in their apartments, it definitely makes you stop and think about your own impact on the world and how you can make a difference.

2- Born Into Brothels – Wow. Sometimes you watch something and feel embarrassingly naive that you were completely unaware that people could live in the way that they do. The movie, which follows children who live in the red light district of Calcutta and where their mothers work as prostitutes, was the winner of the 77th annual Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature. An interesting side-note is that they also bring in Zana Briski, a New York-based photographer who gives each of the children a camera and teaches them basic photography. The images that the children were able to capture (which were later sold in New York to raise money to send the children to boarding school) were absolutely incredible. A great eye-opening documentary.

3- Fuck – A Documentary – It’s f*ckin hilarious. The motherf*ckers who made this f*ckin film are pure f*ckin genius! Find out the origins of the frowned-upon F-word, who’s guilty of using it (from presidents to the pope), and how many different f*cking connotations there are in which in can be used (I’ve provided some examples here).

4- Brother’s Keeper – I must have missed this news story – three “simple-minded” brothers live in the shack where they grew up in the middle of the woods in New York. They have no running water, they barely learned how to read, and all they do is farm and go in and out of town on their green or red tractors. Everyone in the town seems to have a soft spot for these “boys with old-men faces.” Well, when one of the brothers dies, the police take another brother into custody and charge him with murder, which creates a frenzy of a trial where he’s eventually found not guilty. Their old-fashioned, isolated way of living was so interesting.

5- A Complete History of my Sexual Failures – OK this dude seriously needs to get laid… and I’m sure he did after this documentary came out. It begs the question: what can we learn from our exes? And as filmmaker Chris Waitt quickly discovers after reconnecting with his ex-girlfriends, you might not want to know the answer to that question. He’s pathetic and hilarious and discombobulated… and I loved him!

Last night I attended a dinner with my fellow Montreal-based SweetSpot writers as well as our editor Vanessa… I’ve been emailing with Vanessa for at least a year and we’d neither met nor spoken on the phone… and we live in the same city. Ha ha modern technology.

I also met a fellow writer who I’ve “known” (ha ha via modern technology) for over five years. How crazy is that? The other writers I recognized more by their Twitter names than their actual birth-given names!

I’ve been completely obsessed with documentaries since we got our free trial with Netflix, and it got me to thinking – if I want to get my “name” out there I should make some sort of documentary myself, conduct a random (but nonetheless interesting) social experiment and get people talking. So I thought – what if I rented a hotel/apartment for one month (maybe longer) and attempted to maintain my relationships with people ONLY through the internet? I mean, communicate with family, friends and my husband via chat, email and Skype ONLY. Order food. Have no human contact. Would my relationships change? Would my marriage suffer (by the way, Mike thought this was a GREAT idea… hmph!)? Would I survive being so isolated or would I still feel e-connected to people? We already have so many “friendships” through social networking like Twitter and Facebook, so could our entire social existence survive via the web?

How often do you say you “know” someone or are “friends” with someone simply because they’re on your friends or followers list and yet you’ve never met face-to-face?? How many relationships do you maintain through emailing and chat, not actual get-togethers?

So, if there is anyone out there willing to give me an isolated place to live and provide me with food, I’ll start working on my documentary. Haha modern technology… you make me laugh and never cease to amaze me!

What takes less time? Let me tell ya – volunteering. Especially with older people.

It’s no secret I love bubbies. I’ve blogged/Facebooked about them often. I will definitely find a new home where I can volunteer this year because I really miss it, but I do continue to see one of the sweet women from the Griffith McConnell where I volunteered for a year before it closed down. She lives in Westmount now and has no family… she hates the food at her new home, so I try and visit her at least once a month to bring her some groceries or homemade meals – soup, desserts, fresh fruit, etc. I love spending time with her. She’s lovely. And I loved the years I had visiting my great-grandmother at her nursing home (she passed away at a ripe 102), and my year at the Griffith was wonderful.

I can’t seem to figure out why people don’t visit nursing homes more often. I suppose older people who are not “all there” can be a tad intimidating or make someone uncomfortable. But for the most part, people seem to love that cute little old lady in line at the pharmacy. Older people have so much to offer – they’re warm and sweet and very wise. We spend so much time “chasing the clock,” eating nutritiously or exercising so we can live longer, but in the end, if you are lucky enough to make it to your 90s or even past 100, you’ve often outlived spouses and siblings and friends and wind up lonely in a nursing home. Older people are often forgotten but they still have so much to give, and it’s such a shame to think that they don’t get to share that infinite wisdom with someone.

So why don’t we take an afternoon a month to visit one of these lonely souls with wonderful stories and advice? I guarantee that if you penciled in just one hour with someone in an old folks home you’d be hooked. You’d find yourself quickly promising Miss Helen that you’ll be back in a few weeks, and you’ll end up bringing her a potted plant or her favourite gossip mags, because you’ll be immediately attached.

Everyone has someone who will “stick up” for them – kids have their parents and, even if they fail them, there are government departments that will intervene. Same for teenagers, adults have loads of resources at their disposal, but what happens to the 98-year-old woman with dementia who has no family and is living at a government-run nursing facility? She’s reached the end of the line and has no one looking out for her best interests, ensuring that she gets more than just “basic care” – who is making her smile, touching her affectionately, listening to her tales (no matter how wild they may seem)?

Those who live in nursing homes achieved what we’re all striving for – to live a long life. So they deserve to have company, warmth, and love during those last years of their full lives. Every town has an old folk’s home, and ALL of us have a spare HOUR a MONTH. Give back. What goes around comes around, and if all your cardio flax-eating pays off, you’ll appreciate the company you’ll receive at old age too.